A Variety of Resources

For moments of Crisis...

Emergency Resources can be found here.

Books, Ted Talks, websites...

On Relationships and Sexual Happiness...

Arousal: The Secret Logic of Sexual Fantasies by Michael J. Bader

Enduring Desire: Your Guide to Lifelong Intimacy by Michael E. Metz

Intimacy & Desire: Awaken the Passion in Your Relationship by David Schnarch

Love Sense: The Revolutionary New Science of Romantic Relationships by Dr. Sue Johnson

Mating in Captivity: Unlocking Erotic Intelligence by Esther Perel

(also see Esther Perel's Ted Talk on The Secret to Desire in Long Term Relationships or Rethinking Infidelity)

The Five Love Languages by Gary Chapman

Relationship and Sex Advice of all kinds by Dan Savage (Savage Lovecast) (Savage Love Column)

The Seven Principals for Making Marriage Work by John Gottman

The State of Affairs: Rethinking Infidelity by Esther Perel 

sexual functioning for people with penises...

Coping with Erectile Dysfunction: How to Regain Confidence and Enjoy Great Sex by Barry McCarthy and Michael Metz

Premature Ejaculation Help resource website 

sexual functioning for people with vulvas...

Betty Dodson and Carlin Ross (youtube channel) (website)

Come As You Are: The Surprising New Science that will Transform your Sex Life by Emily Nagoski

(also see Emily Nagoski's Ted Talks on Confidence & Joy and The Truth About Unwanted Arousal)

Women's Anatomy of Arousal by Sherri Winston

Specific to Non-monogamy...

Designer Relationships: A Guide to Happy Monogamy, Positive Polyamory, and Optimistic Open Relationships by Mark Michaels & Patricia Johnson

Opening Up: A Guide to Creating and Sustaining Open Relationships by Tristan Taormino

Sex at Dawn by Christopher Ryan & Cacilda Jethá

The Ethical Slut: A Practical Guide to Polyamory, Open Relationships, and Other Adventures by Dossie Easton & Janet W. Hardy

Specific to Kink...

The Ultimate Guide to Kink: BDSM, Role Play and the Erotic Edge edited by Tristan Taormino 

When Someone You Love is Kinky by Dossie Easton

LGBTQ Specific...

Bi America: Myths, Truths, and Struggles of an Invisible Community (Bisexuality) by William Burleson

Free Your Mind: The Book for Gay, Lesbian, and Bisexual Youth and their Allies by Ellen Bass &Kate Kaufman 

Genderqueer: Voices from Beyond the Gender Binary by Joan Nestle & Claire Howell

Get Closer: A Gay Man's Guide to Intimacy and Relationships by Jeffrey N. Chernin

Sexual Intimacy for Women: A Guide for Same-Sex Couples by Dr. Glenda Corwin

Trans-Kin: A Guide for Family and Friends of Transgender People by Dr. Eleanor A. Hubbard & Cameron T. Whitley

True Secrets of Lesbian Desire: Keeping Sex Alive in Long-Term Relationships by Renate Stendhal

On Childbirth...  

Birth as an American Rite of Passage by Robbie E. Davis-Floyd

Ina May's Guide to Childbirth by Ina May Gaskin

When Survivors Give Birth: Understanding and Healing the Effects of Early Sexual Abuse on Childbearing Women by Penny Simkin & Phyllis Klaus


On Parenting...

Far from the Tree: Parents, Children, and the Search for Identity by Andrew Solomon

Love and Logic Magic for Early Childhood: Practical Parenting From Birth to Six Years by Jim Fay & Charles Fay, Ph.D.

No-Drama Discipline: The Whole-Brain Way to Calm the Chaos and Nurture Your Child's Developing Mind by Daniel J. Siegel, M.D. & Tina Payne Bryson, Ph.D. 

The Longest Shortest Time podcast episode "The Parents' Guide to Doing It" with guest, Esther Perel

The Whole Brained Child by Daniel J. Siegel, M.D. & Tina Payne Bryson, Ph.D. 

The Wholehearted Parenting Manifesto by Brené Brown

On Trauma and Healing...

Complex PTSD: From Surviving to Thriving by Pete Walker

Healing Sex: A Mind-Body Approach to Healing Sexual Trauma by Staci Haines

Pandora's Project Their library section (under "recommended reading") has an extensive list of books for sexual abuse survivors, domestic abuse survivors, and secondary survivors. 

The Complex PTSD Workbook: A Mind-Body Approach to Regaining Emotional Control & Becoming Whole by Arielle Schwartz

The Courage to Heal: A Guide for Women Survivors of Child Sexual Abuse by Ellen Bass & Laura Davis

Trauma and Recovery: The Aftermath of Violence - from Domestic Abuse to Political Terror by Judith L. Herman

Why Won't You Apologize: Healing Big Betrayals and Everyday Hurts by Harriet Lerner

sex education

For Teens...

Check out this new app for sex ed called Juicebox!

"Sex Education for the Real World" - Scarletteen

"By Teens, For Teens" - Sex, etc

North Carolina Sexual Initiatives for Teens (SHIFT)

South Carolina Comprehensive Sex Education Advocates - Tell Them!

 

Local Asheville/wnc resources

Therapists...

I have lots of therapist friends who specialize in various things that I don't do (like working with young children, for example). If you need a referral for therapy with a provider who specializes in something you need help with, please email me and I will do my best to connect you with someone great.  

If you don't have insurance and need a lower fee for sessions, check out Open Path Collective.

Other Resources...

Asheville Planned Parenthood

Asheville Sexologists offering free monthly speaking event on various sex topics - Vino & Vulvas*

Campaign for Southern Equality - including Trans in the South guide

LGBTQ Youth - Youth Outright

Trans and Gender-nonconforming Education and Advocacy - Tranz Mission 

*FULL DISCLAIMER: I am a part of this group and regularly attend and often speak on the panel discussions.